For the One You Love: Chapter 2

[dragonofmemory]

On with Chapter 2!  Here starts the random song themed chapter names, just to warn you.

For the One You Love
A Gundam Wing Fanfiction
By: Memory Dragon
Chapter 1
Disclaimer: Gundam Wing belongs to Sunrise and Bandai. I don't own it and make no claim to. Nor do I make a claim for the end of the first scene. That's from Fullmetal Alchemist because I decided it was too good not to steal.

~

Chapter Two: Wishing You Were Somehow Here Again

Heero stood in front of the grave of his best friend. His new wife had recognized his need to be alone an hour ago, leaving him there to sit in silence.

Duo...

Why? Why just then? Why couldn’t he have left an address of where to be reached on his honeymoon? Why couldn’t he have been there to stop the explosion... He was the perfect soldier, after all; that was what everyone called him. So why couldn’t he have been there to help Duo?

They didn’t know much. For all the police knew, it could have been anything from a random terrorist bombing to something Duo accidentally triggered himself. Hilde was lucky not to have been home at the time. There might have been two bodies, instead of one.

Why Duo, though? Heero would never have imagined it possible for there to be such a huge gap in the world for one person. He had always taken for granted Duo’s playful jabs, Duo’s smile...

Some soldier he was. Soldiers knew better than to make ‘friends.’ But the war was over...

Why was he so upset? He didn’t understand. They were both soldiers at one point. Either of them could have died during the war. There had been several times they nearly died by each other’s hands. So why was this affecting him so much? Ever since Trowa had met the two of him and Relena at the airport after their honeymoon, Heero couldn’t even think straight.

He wasn’t even able to make the funeral. He and Relena hadn’t left an address for fear of pranks from the mischievous pilot. Pranks that might have kept him from dealing with something explosive...

Why?

“Heero...”

Heero looked up. Quatre stood there, uncertainly. The blond looked towards Duo’s grave briefly, tears forming in his eyes. “I heard from Trowa that you just got back.”

Heero just went back to his vigil, staring emptily at the grave. He didn’t say anything, either to greet the blond or to answer his question. Quatre sat down beside Heero on the ground, pulling his knees to his chest in a compact position. “I’m sure... I’m sure Duo wouldn’t have... wanted to spoil your honeymoon like this,” he said softly.

Neither of them spoke for some time after this. The shared pain was too much for the small talk Quatre had attempted. The blond was finally able to control his grief, but the next part would be just as hard...

He watched Heero’s steady breathing, debating whether or not to say anything. Duo wouldn’t have wanted.... And it would hurt Heero very much... but he deserved to know.

“Heero... Duo was... He never said anything to me about it. The one time I confronted him, he said it was best left in the shadows...” Quatre paused, catching a breath. He wasn’t making much sense, but Heero didn’t seem to be listening anyway. His old friend just continued to stare at the grave. As if in watching long enough Duo would come out from behind the stone and smile. Say something about what a great joke it was. How he’d had everyone fooled.

No, this wouldn’t be easy at all. Quatre swallowed, trying to wet his mouth as it suddenly went dry. “Heero, I know what I felt from him. Duo was... Duo was in love with you.”

Heero looked up, visibly startled. Of all the things he might have expected Quatre to say... This had to be the last of them. “In love...”

“In love with you.” There. Quatre had said it. For better or for worse, it had been said. Quatre had the feeling Duo would have still disapproved, but... It felt right, telling Heero finally. He never liked keeping secrets from his friends.

It took Heero a while for the full meaning of the statement to sink in. It was impossible. It was Duo who always consoled him when Heero had been uncertain of Relena’s feelings. Duo had been the one to push him towards buying the ring. He had even threatened to propose for him if he didn’t hurry up. So why then...

But Quatre had no reason to lie to Heero. His other sense had never failed him before either. As unbelievable as it seemed, Heero knew the blond’s ability to feel other people’s emotions was real. He’d seen it at work.

And it would explain the occasional sad look Duo gave him...

Heero was horribly confused for one of the first times in his life. There was no clear path now, nothing he could think of to do. The world seemed to be spinning endlessly, falling out from under him. No amount of screaming would make it stop.

“That’s funny.” Quatre’s soft voice cut through his thoughts like a knife. Heero grabbed on to the words as if they were his only lifesaver to reality. However, Quatre’s next words threw him back into his spiraling thoughts. “It almost felt... felt like Duo was here...”

“Why?” Heero finally managed to ask. It was the one question that kept pounding at his skull. But Quatre remained silent. Could not even he answer Heero’s question? “Why?!” He repeated again, fist coming down on the pavement.

“If you mean why he died, I don’t know.” Quatre uncurled from his position and rose slowly. “It wasn’t suicide, I know that much. If you mean why he loved you...” The blond faded off. He met Heero’s eyes, surprising the other man with the conviction in them. “Heero, you are many things. But no matter what you may think, you aren’t replaceable. You give people the courage to move on. You’re the type of person everyone naturally respects.”

Once again, Quatre startled Heero. But the blond wasn’t done yet. “If you meant why Duo smiled when you married Miss Relena...” He paused again, this time looking away. “It was probably because your happiness meant more to him than his own.”

“The things you do for the one you love...” Duo’s voice rang through his mind, as if it had happened yesterday. Suddenly, Heero felt moister on his cheek.

“Heero...”

“It’s started to rain.”

Quatre looked up at the bright electric lights of the colony that was shining down on the two of them. Though the colonies could and did recreate rain from the planet below, today it was as if the sun meant to mock the two of them. He closed his eyes. “Yes, it has.”

* * *

I hadn’t expected Quatre to be there. Do you know how hard it is to keep your presence from an empath? Near impossible! Jeeze, but that was tough. Lucky for me, he put it down to a ghost.

I hadn’t expected Heero to react that way either... Why did Quatre have to tell him that, anyway?! Honestly, I don’t know what was going on in that little blond head of his. Didn’t he see how much that hurt Heero?

Heero... I didn’t mean for it to hurt him like that. I guess he’s blaming himself for being on his honeymoon when it happened. I should have thought of that. But it was too good of a chance to waste.

Oh well. What’s done is done. I can’t change anything now. Besides, this is for the best. I can protect him and Relena much easier now. Better too. Really. He’ll forget about me, soon enough. Then he can get on and live his life the way he was supposed to, without me.

Money isn’t a problem for me. I have more than enough in a special account to last me a couple years at least. And that’s with all the expenses toward protecting the Yuys included. No small feat, let me tell ya.

After that, it would be easy to return to picking up small, but well paying jobs. That’s how I got most of the money in the first place. Most of them weren’t exactly legal... But I’ve yet to take a job that my conscience objected to. Besides, if worst comes to worst, I could always nip a bit from Quatre’s account. I’m sure he wouldn’t mind.

And he owes me for being a blabber mouth like that. I still can’t believe he told Heero! Never mind that I’m supposed to be dead! Heero doesn’t need that kind of guilt right now. I don’t need it either... It was so hard not to jump out from my hiding place and try to comfort him. Especially when he started crying.

Heero crying over me. Now isn’t that the last thing I ever pictured him doing?

I... I don’t know what I expected him to do. I almost wanted him to brush off the news of my death when Trowa told him, even if that would have been more painful to me. I didn’t want to hurt him like that...

At least he has lots of friends to fall back on now. Trowa had probably been the one to send for Quatre, knowing how the empath was good at that sort of thing. Heck, he even has a new wife that he can run to comfort to. Soon, he’ll learn to forget about me and be happy. I’ll make sure of that.

I have the feeling those two are going to need all the help they can get too. Already, I’ve caught wind of an assassination attempt on Relena to be executed next month. It will be easy enough to squash, but I don’t see how she’s survived this long on her own. Even with Heero’s protection, she’s a pricey target!

At least Quatre is gone now. I’m getting worried about Heero though. He hasn’t moved since Quatre left, and it’s nearly dark out. I’m sure he hasn’t eaten all day either. If I have to, a ghostly appearance might be in order. Or something else to knock some sense into him!! I wonder what I could get away with...

“Duo...”

It was all I could do to stop myself from answering. Stupid reflexes. Yeah, that’s a bright idea. Ruin my cover by accidentally answering to my name! So brilliant, Duo...

“I don’t... I don’t know what to do... I don’t even know how I feel right now...” You should go home to your loving wife and eat something. You should feel relieved that there’s no more Duo to bug you anymore. More importantly, you should forget that he even existed and move on with your life. Honestly. Not that hard, Heero.

“I’m... sorry.” He's wha? Now I’m confused. “I’m sorry I never realized... I put you through... so much pain...” Aw, come on, Heero! You’re hurting me more now with your angst fest now then you ever did obsessing over Relena! Stop looking so sad, damn it!

Heero stood up finally. Good. He’s gonna leave now. I... damn. I can’t take much more of this... “I’m sorry...” he repeated. Then, almost too soft for me to hear, “and thank you.”

Heero walked away after that, but I couldn’t follow him. Not after that. I had planned to start shadowing him tonight... I just can’t now. If I blow my cover now, I’ll lose this chance forever. And I don’t trust myself at the moment.

It’s better this way...

* * *

A lone figure came out of the shadows in the graveyard. He stopped by one of the grave stones, a tear falling from his eyes as he said, “You’re welcome, Heero.”

And with that he melted back into the shadows...

~TBC~

Quote of the Chapter:

"Wishing you were somehow here again
Wishing you were somehow near
Sometimes it seemed if I just dreamed,
Somehow you would be here..."
--Christine, Phantom of the Opera (from the Wishing You Were Somehow Here Again lyrics)